At puatraining.com we know that great, natural, game doesn’t run to a script. As much as we’d like to think you can plan the A-Z of an interaction; we know it’s actually about developing the skills that mean you can build genuine connections with even the hottest, smartest and high value of girls.
So it’s time to get ‘out of your head’ and away from all that theorising; instead let’s work on the skills that will make you more present, more real, and way more successful in interactions.
- Actively Listen:
So what if you’ve memorised the best DHV (demonstration of higher value) anecdote of all time; if it’s irrelevant to the girl, and where your conversation is currently at, then you’re likely to bore her… and appear moderately egotistical. Telling anecdotes that convey how cool you are is fine, just weave it into the conversation somehow:
Oh really? That reminds me of when I….
Listen out for what she’s really interested in speaking about by using the key words she uses to create the next topic out of. For instance if (for some bizarre reason) she said:
The cat sat on the mat
You could talk about your pet cat, how you’ve got a new mat for your apartment or how much you hate sitting down for long periods of time.
- Respond to how she says things
Only part of how we communicate is through the words we say, the rest of how a person is feeling is communicated through their body language, tone and pitch of voice. So say you start nattering to a girl about fashion (a topic all girls love right?) and she noticeably shortens her answers to you, and her voice seems terser, it’s time to guess that she isn’t that interested in what you’re chatting about. So it’s time to change topic. Likewise if you stumble across a topic you think would bore her (football, work, etc) and her eyes light up, then you can throw the rule book out of the window, and chat to her about this as you’ve obviously struck on a passion of hers.
- Notice how she responds to you
Say you have this cocky funny one liner and it always cracks girls up. So you walk up to a girl in a bar and use it as your opener. Unlike all the other girls so far she stares at you blankly, and pulls a frowning expression. Do you jab her in the ribs, with a wink, and say ‘geddit?!’ or do you assume with this one girl this line just isn’t going to fly and be honest about what’s just occurred in the interaction:
Ok, so I have to admit, that joke is my favourite chat-up line. Judging by your frown though we have totally different senses of humour. That’s cool though, I’ll forgive you, as I’m still curious to know if we’ve got anything in common. So let’s start over ok?
By ‘calling out’ what’s non-verbally gone down in the interaction you’ll appear uber socially savvy and confident. At the end of these days it’s these skills, not lines, that make girls go gaga.
For more tips on how to be naturally seductive check out www.puatraining.com
Written by Hayley Quinn